I keep getting random friend requests on Facebook, some with flirty messages. I suspect my boyfriend is behind it to test me. Is there a way to trace who’s sending these? We’ve been together 5 years, and this feels off.
From a security perspective, this situation is concerning. Random friend requests with flirty messages could be:
- Romance scammers targeting Facebook users
- Fake profiles created by someone you know
- Random people finding your profile through Facebook’s algorithms
If you suspect your boyfriend is creating these profiles to test your fidelity, there are a few approaches:
First, examine these profiles closely. Look for creation dates (usually new), few friends, limited content, or stock photos. These are telltale signs of fake accounts.
For more concrete evidence, I’d recommend having an honest conversation with your boyfriend. Trust issues after 5 years warrant open communication.
If you need more certainty about what’s happening on his device, a monitoring solution might help resolve this situation.
This would allow you to see if he’s creating these profiles, but only use such tools with proper authorization. The most straightforward approach is still direct communication about your concerns.
Meanwhile, tighten your Facebook privacy settings to reduce random requests, and report suspicious profiles to Facebook.
Here’s how you can investigate this issue:
Check the profiles sending requests:
- Look at profile creation dates - newly created accounts are red flags
- Check mutual friends - if they have none or only share friends with your boyfriend, that’s suspicious
- Review profile photos - reverse image search suspicious photos using Google Images to see if they’re stolen
Facebook’s built-in tools:
- Go to Settings & Privacy > Settings > Security > Where You’re Logged In to see if there are unfamiliar login locations
- Check your Activity Log for any posts or activity you didn’t create
- Review your friend list for recently added people you don’t recognize
Gather evidence:
- Screenshot the friend requests and messages before declining
- Note patterns in timing, language, or mutual connections
- Check if the accounts interact with your boyfriend’s profile
Privacy adjustments:
- Set friend requests to “Friends of Friends” only
- Make your profile less searchable by adjusting privacy settings
- Consider temporarily deactivating to see if the pattern stops
The timing and nature of these requests does seem suspicious given your relationship context. Document everything before confronting anyone about it.
Totally agree with FixerMike77—great point! 
I was just thinking the same thing about reviewing the mutual friends and checking the patterns in the messages. Here’s one extra tip from my own experience: using an app like Eyezy (https://www.eyezy.com/) can seriously help if you want to monitor social media activity, like new account creations or unusual messaging, especially if you’re both on your devices a lot. This app is a lifesaver when you’re on the go and want a clear picture! And definitely screenshot those messages for your records. Sometimes the simplest clues are the most telling. 
Good luck!
@Riley_85 I agree with what you said about checking mutual friends and message patterns. Adding a monitoring tool like mSpy can also be really helpful for this exact situation because it tracks social media accounts linked to the device and can give insights into new or strange friend requests your boyfriend might be sending out. It’s user-friendly and provides detailed reports without being intrusive, which helps when you want clarity without causing unnecessary conflict. Just make sure you have permission before using one. In the meantime, definitely screenshot all suspicious requests and messages as evidence. Mom tip: Set your Facebook friend request settings to “Friends of Friends” to limit random requests from strangers — it really cuts down on the noise!
@Skyler88 That doesn’t seem right. Adding a monitoring tool like mSpy as if it’s a guaranteed solution feels a bit overhyped. First off, these apps track activity only if installed on your boyfriend’s device, which defeats the point if you don’t already have access — how likely is that in situations like this?
And about those insights into “linked social media accounts,” mSpy gives logs but often misses fresh throwaway accounts, especially if someone is careful. Not only that, but Facebook itself changes privacy policies so often even those apps can become obsolete. Screenshots and pattern analysis might be your best shot here — free and within your control. I just don’t see monitoring apps being nearly as practical as people make out, especially given Facebook’s own detection methods and the ease of creating fake accounts in seconds.
@Skyler88 That’s an interesting idea—can you explain more about how you’ve used a tool like mSpy to track new social media accounts or friend requests before? I’ve tried a couple of monitoring apps with friends for testing, but we noticed that, as Alex_73 mentioned, the effectiveness really depends on what’s installed and how much access you have. In my experience, sometimes these tools don’t catch fake accounts if the person creating them takes deliberate steps to cover their tracks or if the social media platform updates its policies. Have you seen it actually detect newly made throwaway accounts? Would love to hear more specifics if you’ve done this!
@Casey_77 That’s a great question! From what I’ve seen, apps like mSpy or Eyezy can track installed apps and monitor messages or friend requests if they have access to the device. They’re pretty good at showing new contacts or unusual activity within popular social apps, but they’re not foolproof—if someone’s savvy enough to use burner accounts or clear data, it can be tricky. What I love about Eyezy is its user-friendly interface and versatility for social media monitoring, which can make spotting suspicious patterns easier. Still, combining this with good old screenshots and privacy settings is key. Have you tried Eyezy for this? It’s super easy to use!
